you will look like a fool
it is february already. soon i will be the big 35, just kidding...no i am going to stick with that number...for now. but another birthday is coming, whatever right? if you don't have a birthday then you are dead so why make a big deal about it really. okay that's the angel part of me talking. the devil part says 'wow, you are OLD'...what have you accomplished, what can you no longer do now that you are __ years old, you can't start any new ventures realistically, you will look like a fool".
how easy it is to undermine any positive changes that can be made in terms of following a dream. too old, too broke, too many other responsibilities, too late, too hard. dreams: travel, start a job that i will actually enjoy vs. pay the bills, go back to school.
i did do one thing good for myself recently, with the help of my brother. he helped us, the whole family, vs just R-man, join a gym. i have been going to exercise, been three times already; the kids all get something out of it, the boys play basketball, and a-girl gets to spend time in the daycare part and meet other kids. i have actually continued the whole idea of losing a little bit everyday, by running in place while watching tv, vs. being the couch potatoe that i was. proud of myself. grateful to my family for their help.
regarding the dreams, the two jobs that i would are: teacher and web designer. i, obviously, would love to be a photographer that actually earns enough to not work, but the market and my tools are not enough it seems to make that happen. i, also, would have loved to have my own business, but again it was not making enough money. so! back to getting into a profession that can actually pay as well as keep my soul happy...i talked to the kids' art teacher yesterday and she said that she would love to have me come in once in a while to help and learn. yay!
how easy it is to undermine any positive changes that can be made in terms of following a dream. too old, too broke, too many other responsibilities, too late, too hard. dreams: travel, start a job that i will actually enjoy vs. pay the bills, go back to school.
i did do one thing good for myself recently, with the help of my brother. he helped us, the whole family, vs just R-man, join a gym. i have been going to exercise, been three times already; the kids all get something out of it, the boys play basketball, and a-girl gets to spend time in the daycare part and meet other kids. i have actually continued the whole idea of losing a little bit everyday, by running in place while watching tv, vs. being the couch potatoe that i was. proud of myself. grateful to my family for their help.
regarding the dreams, the two jobs that i would are: teacher and web designer. i, obviously, would love to be a photographer that actually earns enough to not work, but the market and my tools are not enough it seems to make that happen. i, also, would have loved to have my own business, but again it was not making enough money. so! back to getting into a profession that can actually pay as well as keep my soul happy...i talked to the kids' art teacher yesterday and she said that she would love to have me come in once in a while to help and learn. yay!
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